How to survive an Italian Christmas Party

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Photo: Annie Roi/Flickr
09:04 CET+01:00
Being invited to a Christmas party is a sure sign you're settling in to your adopted country. But be careful - festive gatherings can be a minefield for foreigners unaware of Italian social etiquette, so read our survival guide to transform yourself into the perfect guest.

What not to wear 

Say goodbye to the fluffy Christmas tree jumper. Photo: benjgibbs/Flickr

In Anglo countries it’s almost as if everyone has a licence to look as stupid as possible. Unfortunately in Italy this rule does not apply. Italians take great care with their appearance, especially at a special occasion – very often this means a chic, all-black outfit. So leave your favourite reindeer jumper and Santa hat at home.

Be fashionably late

Photo: Joel Saget/AFP

Italians are known for their relaxed attitude towards punctuality, and parties are no exception. Arriving at the stated time is just going to mean an hour or so of awkward conversation between you and the confused host until the rest of the guests arrive. So put your extra time to good use by picking out an elegant outfit (see above) and turn up once the party’s in full swing.

Pucker up

Photo: Shutterstock

Don’t be surprised if total strangers greet you with a kiss on each cheek, especially after a few drinks. It goes without saying that you should greet your friends this way – and the same applies when you say goodbye. Remember to kiss and hug everyone you spoke to at the party on your way out, otherwise they may consider you rude.

Bring your own cake

Photo: N i c o l a/Flickr

As well as bringing your own booze (spumante is always a good choice for the festive season), you’ll go up in people’s estimations if you bring along some treats to share around as well. Italians are very fond of their Christmassy desserts – bringing some panettone, torrone, biscotti or Baci would all go down well.

Never, ever turn down food

Photo: Revol Web/Flickr

No matter how much you've eaten already, make sure you don’t refuse any of the food offered to you. Italians take pride in their cooking and are likely to have spent hours perfecting their dishes before serving, so saying you’re full could be perceived as an insult. Make sure you compliment the chef too – and their mum or nonna, who in all likelihood passed on the recipe.

Forget the Top 40

If it’s a family party, the playlist is likely to shun current hits and instead you’ll be treated to some Italian classics. So forget Bieber and Taylor Swift, and prepare yourself for a whole lot of Andrea Bocelli, Claudio Baglioni and Tiziano Ferro, most likely with everyone singing along. And since it’s Christmas, there’ll be plenty of carols and hymns too.

Do the tarantella

This traditional style of dance makes an appearance at every Italian celebration, at least in southern parts of the country. It is thought to date back to the Middle Ages, when victims of tarantism – caused by a tarantula’s bite –would dance frantically, sometimes for several days, to sweat the poison out and avoid falling into a deadly trance, sometimes for several days. Others would accompany them on mandolins or other instruments.

Brush up on your card games

Photo: Alan Cleaver/Flickr

Italians play gambling and card games during the Christmas period like the trick-taking card game 'Bestia', the Italian version of Blackjack 'Sette e Mezzo' and 'Tombola, a type of raffle that originated in southern Italy and is particularly popular around the holidays. But don't panic if you're short on cash - normally only small amounts are wagered.

Get to grips with Befana

Photo: Andreas Solaro/AFP

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This is an important tradition to be aware of if you're going to a party with children, and this is a distinct possibility, since Christmas in Italy tends to be a family affair. Rather than - or in some cases, as well as - Father Christmas, Befana is the good witch who brings Italian children presents on Epiphany Eve (January 5th) so make sure you ask children what they are hoping to receive from her this year.

Behave yourself 

Photo: Kristoffer Trolle

In English-speaking countries it may be socially acceptable to drink your sorrows away during the festive time of year, but in Italy most usually manage to preserve their dignity (or at least their consciousness). Don’t expect to be having a raucous office Christmas party with your Italian colleagues. There may be no event at all, or if there is it's usually quite a formal affair.


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